Handy dig at big Dell

Springbok captain John Smit has warned that the South African match-ups in the Vodacom Super 14 will get nasty, but in Australia the Reds are preparing for a night of ugliness against traditional rival the Waratahs.

And to add spice to this year’s first-up match is the defection of Wendell Sailor from the Reds to the Tahs. Sailor, typically, has been having a full go at his former teammates. Never shy to fuel the fire in the build-up to big matches, Sailor has given his former teammates a roasting.

Former Wallabies and Queensland legend and the voice of Australian television commentary Chris Handy, had this to say of big Dell. It wasn’t too kind.

“The state of Queensland is about to be overrun by invaders from Planet Dell … fresh from their bonding session at a secret training camp on Brokeback Mountain,” Handy said. “The aliens come in all shapes and sizes and many wear diamond-stud earrings. These creatures are known to puff out their chests and make a lot of noise. But believe me, they are totally harmless.

“Be on the lookout for the insignia worn on the front of their uniforms, near where their hearts should be. They have tried to disguise themselves with letters on their backs. But it is the letters on their front which taunt them: HSBC. This stands for Huge Score By Crusaders and refers to a historic event where they came within 80 points of beating a rival tribe.”

Handy then stressed how, on Saturday, Queensland would enjoy “one of our greatest victories”.

Handy was speaking at a traditional function held as part of the build-up to the Aussie derby.