Bones shatter on Sharks

The bones, 12 from 14 in winning identity, are picking the Chiefs to do the Sharks in Hickville on Saturday.

Having rolled them and seen Chiefs stare back at me, I picked them up, spat on them again, rubbed gently, sang my ‘we are black, we are white, we are dynamite’ song, and rolled them again. It didn’t work: What stared back again was a Chiefs win.

I kind of expected it, even though I fought the notion that those duds from the world’s sleepiest town, could actually beat, let alone compete with South Africa’s finest. I expected it because being in Hickville is like being comatosed and history tells us that good players have been known to be rendered mute by the lack of activity in this town; only to be woken by a cowbell over the head when it is too late.

The Sharks traditionally have also had their troubles against the Chiefs and while the Chiefs record of zero from two is in keeping with their tradition of winning nothing at the start of the competition, the bones have picked them to win at home and win for the first time this season.

The big New Zealand derby will have a predictable end with the Crusaders structure and discipline the deciding factor over the ill-discipline and unpredictability of the Canes, who have been off the pace in the first fortnight of the tournament.

The rest has a predictable ring to it, with two exceptions. The Cheetahs (everyone’s favourite) will down the rubble Reds in Brisbane and although my gut says the Blues (a far stronger line-up than the imposters who played in Pretoria) could steal a win in Cape Town, the bones are still picking the home team to win by some margin.

Bones’s round three picks

Crusaders v Canes
Saders 1-10
Tahs v Highlanders
Tahs 10-plus
Chiefs v Sharks
Chiefs 1-10
Brumbies v Force
Brumbies 1-10
Reds v Cheetahs
Cheetahs 1-10
Lions v Bulls
Bulls 10-plus
Stormers v Blues
Stormers 10-plus